I shit you not, this is the third Pinocchio movie we’ve had this year. There’s the live-action Disney remake of course, with Tom Hanks as Geppetto, that everyone loves (sarcasm), the one we’re about to discuss today, directed by Guillermo del Toro, and a Russian-made animation, Pinocchio: A True Story, where Pinocchio is voiced by Pauly Shore in an English dub – I somehow let that one go through to the keeper 🤔🤣 If Pinocchio shows up in Dreamworks’ Puss in Boots: The Last Wish on Boxing Day, then there’ll be a stringless puppet for all seasons. What a world we live in.
Sebastian J. Cricket, the Jiminy of this world, relays the story of Pinocchio – Geppetto once had a son named Carlos, who, quite tragically, died in a missile strike during the Great War, prompting Geppetto to carve a surrogate wooden boy one night in a fit of misery and despair. The Wood Fairy, a mystical guardian of life, takes pity on the poor woodcarver and grants Pinocchio life, making a deal with the watchful Sebastian to guide the puppet in exchange for a wish of his own. To Pinocchio, everything is new and exciting at first, which leads to a seedy carnival master, Count Volpe, taking advantage of Pinocchio’s naivety and putting him on the stage; without sending a cut of the profits home to Geppetto as promised. Geppetto and Sebastian race to reclaim Pinocchio, in a tale playing with looming fascism and the meaning of death.
I haven’t looked hard, but within the swirling criticism of Disney’s live-action Pinocchio this year, I haven’t found must substance. Disney set out to remake their classic after 82 years, and not much more, and I think it’s well put together. But Guillermo del Toro has free reign to bolster this vintage Italian tale to his liking, adding in adult themes and thoughtful new content, and this is much better of course. For one thing, Disney failed to mention that when Geppetto first put Pinocchio together, Geppetto was as drunk as a skunk! With original songs and stunning character design, Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio is never a chore to look at – a culmination of animation and the direction as well. I’ve done myself a mischief having not seen del Toro’s Pan’s Labyrinth before, because I’m sure the level of detail available within the mystical and macabre is already on full display in del Toro’s prior catalogue. But Geppetto and Count Volpe, the human characters alone, are marvelous to see – the shark-fin hair and long snout on the ‘liarsome’ and ‘fibberish’ Count Volpe makes him a striking adversary for Pinocchio (and there were no adjectives for ‘liar’, so I just invented some). The Wood fairy, known to me as the Blue Fairy from Disney, and Pinocchio himself, garner not a bad word to be said, and I love how Geppetto can shave down Pinocchio’s nose or attach new legs when he needs since Pinocchio is a wooden boy.
This movie has prompted me to research the synopsis of the source material for the first time, to see where creative license has been taken – and let’s just say, the original story is quite bonkers, with more animal creatures than you can shake a stick at; Disney really molded something quite unique in 1940. This version, is closer to the Disney retelling but takes liberties of its own. For example, in beefing up the story, it’s wonderful to spend time with Geppetto’s son Carlos, and feel the emotional importance to what Geppetto is trying to do in creating Pinocchio. Despite the absurdity of a living puppet, a talking cricket, life and death, Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio is really quite grounded, with exception to the cricket getting smooshed every five minutes and staying alive – genuinely, when Volpe’s monkey, named Spazzatura, started taking swings at Sebastian with Carlos’ old book, I was frightened that it was akin to attempting murder. I feared for the little cricket’s life, but perhaps crickets get ten like wooden puppets; I don’t know the rules.
Yet, there are times where I realised how ridiculous this story is – brimming with metaphor and nostalgic fairytale sure, it’s a little wackadoodle if you think about it. Marginally, I was turned off by the movie’s pacing at some points, feeling characters learn what the plot needs them to know a little too simply at times, and scenes that closely resemble the exact same story we have known before, snapped me back into being content with what I already had. The enthusiasm to gush at how transfixed I was in the opening act with Carlos dissipated as the movie went on. And shoot me down, but I also didn’t love Christoph Waltz as Count Volpe – I know, what’s the matter with me? One of the best villainous actors of our lifetime, and if he’s not in a Tarantino movie, I often find myself opposed to his role. David Bradley as Geppetto though, what a thought – he’s a long way from Argus Filch in the Harry Potter series and I like it. I also loved the monkey – I don’t know what that says about me or the movie, but I think there’s an important lesson in there for Pinocchio, as some people strive for safety over happiness. Spazzatura seems adjacent to the mute cat Gideon in the Disney version, but this character has an arc and a hearty conclusion.
Ultimately, it’s good. It’s actually as expertly good as something can be without being fantastic. Stop animation is not a mode we come across very often and it’s great to revel in it when it comes about, especially when it’s done this well. Del Toro’s last movie, Nightmare Alley, didn’t have me in raptures either, but I really admire his direction in both. I marvel at this movie’s originality, but when falling upon important beats that we’ve seen already, as recently as earlier this year, it falters like the Disney live-action movie did for me by being repetitive. Yet if Guillermo wants to remake his favourite stories to his liking, like Zemeckis and Spielberg do on a regular basis, then he’s earned the right. And the irony of telling a Pinocchio story with little wooden dolls is also not lost on me. I don’t know how many people will be calling Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio the definitive edition of Pinocchio, but it’s a worthy addition – my punt for Best Animation at next year’s Oscars.
3.5
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