Woah! Have we got a killer new franchise on our hands or what?!
Directed by Gina Prince-Bythewood, The Old Guard follows a team of missionaries led by Andy (Charlize Theron). And, oh yeah, they can’t die. Andy is centuries old, and has found companions along the way, fighting through many wars, and coming across a soldier or two that survived their death. Her latest recruit is Nile (Kike Lane), a U.S. Marine recently revived from a fatal stab wound to the neck. Andy’s crew are being hunted by James Copley (Chiwetel Ejiofor), who’s working for an evil corporation, led by Steven Merrick (Harry Melling), who say they want to do good for the world by figuring out how Andy and her friends stay immortal, but it’s really all about profits, and hoarding the immortals like lab rats for all eternity – naughty boys.
This movie is based off a comic book series I haven’t come across until now; it takes the soldier and survival elements of the famously-established X-Men character, Wolverine, and makes a whole movie just about that. The first act of The Old Guard is serious business; I thought we were on track for a perfect review. The action reminded me of the opening scene of X-Men Origins: Wolverine, and how Riker’s men, including the early attempt at Deadpool, were taking jobs deemed too dangerous or classified for normal military soldiers. But this movie cranks the quality of that scene up to eleven, further highlighting what could have been with Wolverine in 2009… Andy’s crew infiltrate a Sudanese prison camp and do not leave a beating heart behind. Each crew member seems to have a speciality of choice, with Andy wielding a staff looking like that of Boss Nass, but with the combat compacity of Mjolnir; very cool. Then we are introduced to Merrick, the skinny slimy sod that’s running the bad genetics company – he reminded me of Venom, and how Riz Ahmed, whilst being a very competent actor, did not capture the acute villainy required, on display here by the actor best known for Harry Potter’s spoilt tormentor, Dudley. If Harry Melling wants a further career playing sulky criminals, then I think there’s one out there for him; I reckon he’s voice would be perfect for an animated villain as well (Disney, cast him). So with Marvel’s Wolverine and Venom in my mind, this movie was already excelling beyond them; The Old Guard doesn’t imitate comic book movies that have come before, it emulates them.
The first act also saw how grounded The Old Guard was about communicating the deeper facets around the idea of immortality – the melancholy, the futility, of the world changing around them; more often for the worse, with war never ceasing but only getting more precise. Joe (Marwan Kenzari) and Nicky (Luca Marinelli) met after the Crusades and fell in love, but Andy and Booker (Matthias Schoenaerts) cannot share their time with anyone on equal footing, making loneliness another factor of their condition. A story told about a girl that Andy once knew also proves there are some fates worse than death. The crew don’t know why they have been chosen to be the immortal few, but understand that, on a spiritual level, all living things must die, and the movie keeps coming back to God and the idea that everything happens for a reason.
From a technical point of view, the action is shot most convincingly. And thankfully, paved the way by Logan and Deadpool, The Old Guard doesn’t shirk away from highlighting the comic-book level gore and violence, particularly fascinating when the regeneration occurs; the movie puts it front and centre, it’s such a pleasure to see. Andy gets some grand badass moments; shooting Nile in the back of the head instead of chasing her down, for one – she’ll revive, won’t she, so what does it matter, right? Andy’s wisdom is always on show – she’s even slick in deleting a photo from some holiday-makers’ phone, so no attention can be drawn to her whereabouts; that’s an impressive skill that most baby-boomers don’t possess, and Andy has the age of centuries on them. You could argue Andy is almost classically vampiric in her methodical manner, without the fangs and bloodlust, although that doesn’t stop her racking up some corpses.
Having said all that, I do have some thoughts… I fail to believe that this is the first time a crew member has come across someone who wants to figure out the source of their immortality. Humans; we’re curious creatures, and the immortals do present a big mystery to be solved. I assumed this might’ve been a big part of why the missionaries desire to stay discrete in the first place. When Andy first meets Nile, she doesn’t present a compelling reason for Nile to follow her; I expected her to explain “if you stay, they will lock you up and test you.” Even further talk with Nile seems to surround how her family and friends will not understand her, and be angry at her for not being able to pass on her longevity. I thought Andy could’ve said something to Merrick along the lines of “do you think you’re the first mad scientist to want to prod and poke us for a solution?” It seems a bit The Walking Dead to me, where the idea of zombies never exist in the before-time of show’s mythology, but it hardly matters in The Walking Dead where the consequences of a zombie outbreak, inconceivable or not, are pretty much the same – this seems a bit more of a leap, to believe the immortals have never encountered selfish officials, in their years, because the army, the world’s governments and research labs do exist in the same way they do the real world. Moreover, why can’t Nile spend her family’s remaining days with them? Yes, they might grow to resent her, like Booker’s family did, but they might not. To suggest that Nile is now alone in the world is to assume that Nile’s family are arseholes, or not smart enough to keep her safe. Look at Superman’s parents (!), they were able to hide that Clark was superhuman for years on that farm, and Clark Kent had the brains of a child; surely Nile has got more wits about her than a pre-teen Clark Kent… I think…arguing comic book logistics here.
The film is also rushy in the middle, with Joe and Nicky getting captured too easily for my liking, while Andy and Nile hear nothing from their position outside. The two soulmates also kill everyone in the moving van but still jump on the plane to the laboratory at mere gunpoint – I thought some shock collars or inescapable boxes might’ve been more appropriate to transport these unkillable assassins; the threat of getting shot if they don’t comply is not that scary to them after all. And while I’m dissecting the finer points of The Old Guard, it’s also weird that Merrick knocked the former CIA agent Copley unconscious in his home when he proved no longer willing to help, but then left him there. Take him with you! He knows people, he’s too dangerous to be left behind. I know the movie needed Copley to be in his home so he could later communicate to Nile how awesome Andy is, so at least leave him tied up and gauged in his closet or something – these villains wonder why they get foiled; you’ve got to dot the ‘i’s and cross the ‘t’s a little smarter, my immoral friends.
Anyway, I really liked The Old Guard, and the potential behind these characters for the future. Do I need to reiterate that Charlize Theron is awesome, willing to absolutely murder her body for the best action movie – Mad Max: Fury Road, Atomic Blonde; now add The Old Guard to her workout videos. The film weaves four or so different plot threads with not-always flawless success, but there’s no doubt that the end result is compelling. It just goes to show that you don’t need an original idea to create something freshly sophisticated. I’m teetering on the edge of a high 4.0 or a 4.5; oh, go on then.
4.5
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